Happy Birthday Rogers—

Sitting right outside the captain’s door that morning, a Victoria’s Secret bag lay. And if the captain were to open it, a folded piece of paper lay on top of the gifts that were only shoved into plastic Wal-Mart sacks.

If he would open it, the note would read,


Happy Independence Day!

And, you know, happy birthday. To prove a point, I didn’t forget your gifts. And if you don’t understand any of them, you can’t tell me because that’ll just ruin it.

Anyway, have a good one or whatever.

Inside one of the plastic sacks would be a pair of the classic colored Superman socks with actual capes on the back of them, standing up on their own.


In the other would be a pair of—obviously—handmade slippers that were in the shape of tanks and colored in the way that would make them look realistic.


Below all of that however, was a small American flag that a kid would naturally get in the 4th of July parade with Tony’s own handwriting scrawling out ‘MURICA on the side of it with a smiley face on the end.